I told my friend Mike (owner of the Suie in Kincraig Scotland) that Virgin was my favorite airline. His reply? "I'd never name my company "virgin"... too afraid everyone was always trying to fuck me."
I'm flying tomorrow, on Virgin... heading to the UK for a few weeks to see the jerk that has totally put some wacked out voodoo spell on me and turned my brain to pudding in his presence. Sure he's funny, smart, totally cute, and sweet as can be... but he's stilll a jerk for sneakin' in behind the walls I was rebuilding and capturing my heart like he's Mario or Luigi & my heart is the Princess. (Though, come to think of it, he and his best friend might have just earned themselves some new nicknames right there......)
(yes, this is me & The Jerk)
Anyway, I'm flying tomorrow... I hate the day before travel. I hate everything about the day before travel. My mind races, I can't get anything done, I pack & repack like 1000x, I freak out a bit wondering what I might be forgetting, I try to tie up loose ends like I'm dying, and I end up having a severe anxiety attack. It sucks. I blame living on this island for that. If one leaves the house and boards the ferry or a plane to the mainland & you've forgotten something, you're royally fucked.
I remember one year my friend Adam was headed to Costa Rica for the winter, and when he arrived at the airport realized he had forgotten his passport. Know what he did? Called a friend that was a cab driver, had them go to his place, find the passport, bring it to the ferry boat, give it to one of the crew members, then upon docking again on the mainland pass it off to the bus driver headed to the airport, then the bus driver showed up at the terminal where Adam was waiting outside on the sidewalk for the pass off... and made it onto his flight with just a few minutes to spare. I just don't know that I could handle that kind of thing, I'd probably have a nervous breakdown. Honestly though, it'd be a hell of a story to tell years later.
I'm doing everything I can to make sure I forget nothing, or at least nothing of importance. My thinking being that I can buy it when I get to my destination, or at least something comparable. Of course "The Jerk" has informed me that other than my passport and ticket I need no clothes since he intends to keep me in bed for the duration of my stay... so maybe I should just pack like 13 different kinds of pajamas?
At least I know the trip, once I'm on the plane, will be a pleasant one. I "checked in" (like to choose my seat & meal type check in) on line ('cause I'm nerdy enough to do that kind of thing) ... and then saw the link for "in flight entertainment" and decided to see what movies I might get to see. It's been a while since I last flew overseas (about 5 years) but I remember the movie selection was pretty good. Who knew it'd be THIS good?!
..... and here I thought I would just sleep! No way! This is like a menu of guilty pleasure visual comfort food out the wazooo! Had they thrown in a Hillary Duff film I could watch with out anyone but the person sitting next to me knowing...I'd be in guilty pleasure heaven! (Oh don't roll your eyes, you've watched her movies too... pthfft!)
Oh... AND... Virgin gives you these great lil' gift bags (I always snag extras and give 'um to friends when I get home)......
The best part is the socks... slather lotion all over your feet... or even your hands unless you are totally fidgety like me and would go crazy with thumbless mittens on your hands, and put the socks on.. when you get to your destination, take 'um off, throw 'um away and your feet will feel like you've had a pedicure... all baby soft.
My other tip? Fly w/out make up on. NONE. Just wear big sunglasses if you are freaked out by this idea. Seriously, you may look cute upon boarding, but after 7 hours on a plane, in that nasty germ filled dry air, you'll look like a raisin doing a Tammy Faye Baker impression.Snag a bunch of free samples from your local Dept store (or any store that has 'um), you know, the sample packets that don't really count as "liquids"... you can slip 'um in your lil' baggie that you put all those 3 oz containers in, or, hell, slide 'um in a book, they lay flat. Every hour, moisturize. Trust me on this one, you'll thank me upon arrival. See, now that people aren't allowed to meet you at the gate, you have those few minutes between leaving the plane & getting to baggage claim to run into the bathroom at the terminal and fix yourself up. Take a look around at the women that didn't fly free of make up as they stand in front of the mirror, in that horrible lighting, fighting back tears. You'll see.
Oh, and drink LOADS of water. Geeze, you know all this already, right? If you don't, you should. ... and even though I said I was gonna stay awake and watch crappy movies... I'll sleep..... 'cause I don't think I'll be getting much while visiting My Jerk ;p... but that's more than a lil' ok too.
I'm not taking my computer, so .... stay tuned for updates on this latest adventure when I get back.
Also... to all of you friends of mine (and even the lurkers that don't know me), just create a free account and comment once in a while.... I like hearing what you have to say. If I didn't why wouldn't I just write this all in a personal diary, yeah?
See you when I see you~ ♥
