Never Say Never

A few months back, May actually, I was driving along with my friend Mike when I told him about my most recent moment of supreme awesomeness... and we laughed about it, and then laughed more knowing it would never happen again. Today, however,  I really drove home the theory of "never say never."

There I was in my kitchen, suddenly craving a glass of milk. (I do that a lot, I really love milk) I opened the cabinet over the dishwasher where the glasses are kept and pulled out a glass, then turned to open the fridge to grab the milk. (And just because my friend Fred is strange enough to ask "what kind if milk?"... I'll tell you.. it was "Nature's Promise" (Stop & Shop's Organic brand) Skim milk.... it's good stuff!) ... Now, where was I?...

Right, so I had the glass in one hand and the milk in the other, and some part of my brain stopped working in that nano second. You see, instead of reaching out all of 14" to put the glass on the counter, I just braced it between my elbow and my side, unscrewed the top of the milk, grabbed the little plastic pull ring that seals it, and pulled. Obviously my spazzy ass spilled some.... and then I dropped the plastic ring. I bent down to get it, spilled some more milk in the process, stood up and smacked my skull on the corner of the cabinet door I had yet to close. It stung... it stung bad. So bad in fact that it brought tears to my eyes... and yet again, I looked down at the floor in that moment and cracked the hell up.......

I have officially cried over spilled milk twice in my life now.